Try Again
by PrettyLittleDoctorWho
Summary: Spencer has had a few really though weeks, including a bad breakup and a hard time with her family and illness. So what happens when in between this a new Guy shows up that could change her life forever. Will Spencer push him back or find the strength to Try Again? My first story ever, please review :)
1. Preview

**So hey guys! This is my very first story and I just want to try writing, so please be nice ;)**

**This is a Spoby story, because it is just my favourite ship ever! It has the characters from PLL, but not the story. Here is a short chapter one and when I get good reviews I will go on with it.**

**Sadly I do not own Pretty Little Liars.**

Spencer sat up and was wet with sweat. She had this nightmare again, just like every night. But it wasn't really a nightmare, it was more living what happened again. Just that she wasn't really there. She was more watching everything from above: herself, her family and the street full of cars.

_Flashback_

_Spencer Hastings was 11 years old and completely happy with her life. Not like most children that age, who want more and more, she was just happy. She was going to visit her best friends family with her family for Thanksgiving and she hadn't seen her for some time, because she lived in Portland. _

_Her familys car was full with suitcases and food baskets, so there was just a little room for Mr. and Mrs. Hastings and their two daughters Melissa and Spencer. Everybody was happily chatting with each other, just like every other family would do, but that was going to change soon._

'Is everything okay Spence?' a concerned voice asked. 'Yeah.. It will be fine, Ar.' Spencer answered, but her voice was still cracking. Even 10 years after what happened, Spencer was still full of shock after seeing it all again. Now she was 21, close to 22 and living with her longtime school friend in college.

'Did you have that dream again? I thought you said it was gone?' Aria asked concerned. 'I thought so, too.. Seems like it is back again..' Of course, after everything bad that had happened in the last few weeks, this nightmare had to come back again! Life just isn't fair. At least not for Spencer Hastings.

**I know this isn't saying much about neither the story nor Spoby, but I promise it will all come together soon. Just review so I know if I should continue with the story.**

**love you guys!(yes, I love you for just reading this :D)**

**-PrettyLittleDoctorWho**


	2. Chapter 1

**Hey Guys :) I decided to write more of this story. I liked the reviews I got so far and I will answer them after this chapter.  
So this is actually the first chapter and has the preview again ant the beginning.**

**I will stop talking now ;)  
And sadly I do not own Pretty Little Liars **

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Spencer sat up and was wet with sweat. She had this nightmare again, just like every night. But it wasn't really a nightmare, it was more living what happened again. Just that she wasn't really there. She was more watching everything from above: herself, her family and the street full of cars.

_Flashback_

_Spencer Hastings was 11 years old and completely happy with her life. Not like most children that age, who want more and more, she was just happy. She was going to visit her best friends family with her family for Thanksgiving and she hadn't seen her for some time, because she lived in Portland._

_Her familys car was full with suitcases and food baskets, so there was just a little room for Mr. and Mrs. Hastings and their two daughters Melissa and Spencer. Everybody was happily chatting with each other, just like every other family would do, but that was going to change soon._

"Is everything okay Spence?" a concerned voice asked. "Yeah.. It will be fine, Ar"' Spencer answered, but her voice was still cracking. Even 10 years after what happened, Spencer was still full of shock after seeing it all again. Now she was 21, close to 22 and living with her longtime school friend in college.

"Did you have that dream again? I thought you said it was gone?" Aria asked concerned. "I thought so, too.. Seems like it is back again.." Of course, after everything bad that had happened in the last few weeks, this nightmare had to come back again! Life just isn't fair. At least not for Spencer Hastings.

"You should try getting back to sleep now. I know the past weeks have been though, but we have to get up early tomorrow.", Aria said while laying back down in her bed. "I know, goodnight Ar."

The next morning Spencer woke up really tired and wasn't in a good mood. But Aria always knew what to do, so she had gotten up earlier and made breakfeast for the two of them. Of course it was Spencers favourite: Eggs, Sandwiches and really strong coffee. And with strong I mean so strong Aria had to put 4 spoons of sugar inside to make it taste.

So Spencer woke up with a bad mood, but that changed as soon as she smelled the breakfeast. She got up quickly and walked into their little kitchen with just her pajamas and Flip Flops on. Aria was already sitting at the table waiting for her.  
"Thanks Aria! you are the best!" Spencer said while sitting down and starting to eat.

Aria was already dressed, so Spencer decided to eat fast, so she would not have to wait too long. After breakfeast with a little small talk, Spencer got up and went into the bathroom. She brushed her teeth and hair and made it into a loose Fishtailbraid on the side of her face and put a little bit of makeup in. After that she went to her closet to get dressed. She decided to go for a red skinny jeans with a white blouse with little feathers printed all over it. She used brown boots and a brown leather belt to finish her outfit.

When Spencer had finished getting ready Aria had already done the dishes to do something useful while waiting. They both left their little apartment to get to class early. When they arrived they had 10 minutes left until the class would begin and they took their seats next to Emily and Hanna. They had met the girls in college last year and were really good friends by now.

They talked about boyfriends(wich was mostly Hanna and Aria, because Emily was gay and Spencer was single again), the weather and their strange professor who just came in with a guy none of them had ever seen before. "Hello everybody, please take your seats!", the professor said, even though everybody was already sitting in their seats. "We have a new student at this college and he will stay in our class." he said pointig at the new guy.

"This is Toby Cavanaugh."

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**SofFernandezz: Thank you. I think I will but a little Flashback in every chapter and maybe Spencer will talk about it with her friends. So you will find out. And to really see Toby you will probably have to wait for the next chapter right? ;) hope you liked this cahpter too :)**

** .PLL: Thanks! I hope you will like the rest of the story. And that was actually what I intended to do;) Get you all a little curious.**

**NewEnglandMuggleGirl: Thank you**

**Okay, I hope this helped getting more people interested ;) I would like some more reviews:)  
****I will try to update soon  
xoxo PrettyLittleDoctorWho **


	3. Chapter 2

**Hey guys :) I actually planned on updating sooner, but I was meeting with my friends a lot lately, so I didn't find the time to write. Sorry for that.  
I hope you like this chapter.  
I still don't own the characters, just this story has been growing in my mind.**

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"This is Toby Cavanaugh." Everybody was looking at the new guy. Spencer could tell from her seat, that he was taller than her, probably something about 6 feet. He had light brown hair and ocean blue eyes, that were well complimentet by his blue shirt, wich allowed people to notice he had a well trained body. Even though every girl in the room would say he was a really handsome boy, he seemed to be really unsure.

"Why don't you introduce yourself to the class Mr. Cavanaugh?"  
He looked to the ground shyly when he started talking. "My name is Toby Cavanaugh and I am 19 years old, I come from New York and just moved here. I am 6'1 tall and I don't really know what more to say.." Spencer had to grin. The most obvious reason would be because she was really good in guessing the heights of other people, but something she would never admit to her friends right now was, that she thought he was reallly sweet.

She looked to her left and saw Aria giving her a questioning look.  
"What?"  
"You know you are grinning like a teenage girl, right?"  
"I am not!", Spencer answered annoyance in her voice and turned her head back to the front and before Aria could say anything more, their professor said: "Okay Mr. Cavanaugh, you can take your seat over there next to Ms. Hastings." Spencer looked up and gave the guy a friendly smile and he walked to his new seat fast. It seemed like he really didn't like that much attention.

Normally Spencer was a really good student, but this lesson she was not paying much attention. She tried to, but her eyes always found their way to her new seat neighbour. Later she did not even remeber anything that had happened in these few hours.

She tried to take her eyes of of him, but she always found herself staring at him again after a few minutes.  
She didn't even realized the time of that class was over until their professor told them they could leave. Spencer started to pack all her stuff fast, because she was sure her friends had realized her weird behaviour this lesson and wanted to get away from them really fast to avoid any questions.

But right when she wanted to leave the professor had to call her again. "Ms. Hastings, Mr. Cavanaugh? Could I talk to you for a minute?"

Spencer would have been happy to kill her professor at that moment, because she was pretty sure the handsome new guy had noticed her staring at him, too. I mean, come one, would not realize that someone is staring for over an hour?!  
She started walking down and when everybody had left she just wanted to ask what the hell was going on(she was REALLY annoyed at that moment) when her professer started talking.

"I thought, because you are one of our best students and I think I can trust you to do this well, I would like you, Ms. Hasting, to show Mr. Cavanaugh around." At that moment Spencer was sure her eyes would probably plop out of her head. She wasn't sure what she had expectet, but surely that was not it.  
She had to been staring into the air for some time, because the professor was asking her if everything was okay.

"Yeah, everythings fine.." "Good then, I'll let you two leave now and Ms. Hastings?" "Yes?!" "Please be nice", the professor said with a wink. Spencer had no idea why, like I said before: Weird professor..

Spencer walked out of the room without saying anything, so te new guy had to nearly run after her. They walked like this a little while until Spencer stopped at a door with a little figure of a woman on it. "If you really want me to show you around, you will have to wait here a moment." And with that she walked into the bathroom. I am not going to lie to you, Spencer really thought, that she had been so mean, that he would be gone until she went back outside.

Actually she did not run there to be mean, but she actually needed to go to the toilet. As weird as this sounds now, the bathroom was one of the few places she could really think about everything happening. About Andrew, who she would've liked not to think about, the accident and her father.

_Flashback_

_The Hastings were driving down the Highway, still happily chatting with each other and they were really lucky, because there were just a few other cars driving on that Highway. Spencer looked out of the window, to see how long the way would still be, when she saw a really fast car driving closer and closer to her car. And all of the sudden everything changed._

_Everything happened so fast. Suddenly she couldn't see anything and felt a lot of pain in her legs and arms. She tried to open her eyes, but she was too scared what she could see. Then she heard a voice she didn't know. _

_"Hello sweetie, can you hear me? I am Cece Drake and I am here to help you. Can you give me a little sign, so I know you hear me?" Spencer did not know what else to do, so she nodded a little bit, but wished she didn't, because a sharp pain went straight through her body. "Okay sweetie, we already got everyone else out of the car, but you need to help me, because I can't move you without your help. There is too much around you."  
"But it hurts to move!" Spencer said really quiet, afraid that it would hurt too. "I know sweetie I know. You just need to lift your head and your legs a little bit and then hold on to me okay. Then I will carry you to our car, okay?"_

_Little Spencer nooded and did was she was asked to and soon felt arms wrapped around her and got lifted up and then she felt fresh air. Now she actually got herself to open her eyes and the first thing she saw was a friendly looking, blonde with an ambulance uniform. When Spencer looked past her she closed her eyes again in shock._

When a knock on the bathroom door suddenly got Spencer back into the presence, the first thing she realized was, that she was crying. It was not a sobbing-crying thing. It was a really quiet crying with the tears just streaming down her face.

The second thing she realized was a deep and friendly voice from outside the bathroom, she just heard one time and she would not have thought to hear it now. "Spencer, are you okay? You have been in there for nearly 15 minutes now.." "I am coming. Just a moment.." Spencer answered and tried to not let the sound of her voice tell him she was crying.

She went to the mirror and looked at herself. She was not really looking bad, but she looked so sad it would have made her cry to see someone else looking so sad. Her eyes showed the pain deep inside she was hiding so often. Her cheeks were shimmering, because of the tears still streaming. Spencer took a few deep braeth and put some water on her face and dried it again.

She looked at her reflection one last time and decided, she could go back outside like this. When she opened the door, the boy, whose name she remembered to be Toby, looked at her caring and she would have nearly started crying again. "Is really everything okay?"  
"Actually not really and it is really hard to explain." What he did next surprised Spencer a lot. She would have thought he would ask some stupid liek'Do you wanna talk about it?' what she clearly did not want to do or that he would have done nothing and there would have been a really awkward silence. But instead he just took a step closer and wrapped his arms around her and held her.

Spencer had no idea how long they stood there like that and she wondered why she was letting him do that. She hadn't been so close to anyone but her best friends for a long time and now a total stranger was huggimg her. But for a reason she didn'T know she had no problem with that. She actually liked it.

"Toby?" she asked quiet. "Yeah?", he asked putting her hair behind her ear, so she could look him in the eyes. "Thank you."

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**_Spoby. Treegan. PLL_: Thank you very much. I tried to do that in this chapter, I hope it is long enough ;) **

**_NewEnglandMuggleGir_l: I am really glad to hear that, because I was wondering if I was doing fine with that.**

**_dreamcath3r_: Thank you so much for your review. This is what I really need. Of course it is good to hear I am doing fine, but to really hear things I could do better is what helps to make this better for my readers, so you get a big THANK YOU!  
I hope you like my new summary and I tried to make the chapter longer and I think that worked quite well.**

**_Synful92_: Thank you so much Synful92! This review actually made my day :) I read it and I instantly had to smile :) I am glade you like this so far and I hope it will stay like that. Thank you again for telling people to try this story out. That actually means a lot to me, because I love your story and you must have a lot of great fans :*  
You know what would make this day even better? An update for Whisper to a Scream. I really love that story  
xoxo PrettyLittle Doctor Who**

**Guest: Thank you :)**

**So I hope you guys liked this chapter. Leave me some reviews plaese(I also take them when you did not like and tell me what I could do better)**

**I will try to update faster next time**

**xoxo PrettyLittleDoctorWho**


	4. Chapter 3

**Hello everybody. I am so so so so so so so so so so so sorry about not updating, but I had this really big thing from school. It had something to do with a job tyout and planning out the futere and all that stuff. And adding to that I am writing an exam from my spanish class tomorrow and a math test on thursday.  
****I know that is a really bad excuse, but I willtry to update faster and I hope I caould make you happy with this chapter.**

**I still don't own anything, but the plot of this story.**

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After Spencer went home that day, she thought about Toby a lot. But everytime her mind wandered off too far, so you could see it, Aria would get her back down to planet earth with asking her anything completely random. That was because Aria new excactly what Spencer normally thought about.  
But that day, Spencer thought about something Aria would never have thought of. She wondered why she had let Toby be so nice to her. After her last, really bad, breakup, she had decided to let no boy ever steal her heart again and now she was letting a boy be that nice to her.

Andrew, her last boyfriend, had been everything for her. She had loved the way he looked, the way he talked, the way he smelt, his intelligence, his sense of humor and that he was the nicest guy she had ever met. But on this list, with things she loved about him she would have never thought that this one, special thing about him had been wrong from the start. Very, very wrong.

After thinking about all of that, Spencer mind wandered off, to what Aria thought she had been thinking about the whole time. She thought about the accident again. And about her father.

_Flashback_

_Little Spencer closed her eyes again in shock of what she had just seen. The few seconds her eyes had been opened had been enough.  
The two cars were lying on their sides and every airbag had opened. The Hastings car had nothing left where the windows should have been and the front side of the car was now just a few inches long. The second car was smashed up to the side of the Hastings car where Spencer and her father had been sitting._

_But the worst thing was, that everything was covered in blood._

With all these thoughts still in her head, Spencer went to bed and did not sleep very well that night. In her dreams she dreamt about the accident, but the dream was different this time. The car who drove into the Hastings car was driven by Andrew and he did not get hurt. Only The passengers in the Hastings car got hurt.

But then everything changed. The dream turnt out to not be what evryone would call a nightmare. After the accident Toby showed up and rescued her and every single family member of her. Everybbody else would have considered this a nice turning in the dream, but for Spencer, that changed nothing about her dream being a nightmare.

She still was unsure, why she thought about him that way. I did not make any sense for her. She only knew him for a few hours and just couldn't get him off of her mind. What was wrong with her?! She even let him follow her into her worst nightmare.  
Hanna would say: "You only dream about someone, when they are thinking about you at that moment.". But Spencer didn't believe in that. She was a realist. You only dream of someone, when you want something from them, not the other way round.

But since when did Spencer Hastings want something from a boy he only knew for a time that short? It just stood against everything she wanted to do after she got away from Andrew. These were the thoughts that were in her mind while she slept dreamless after her nightmare.

The next morning Aria and Spencer met up with Emily and Hanna two hours before their class started that day. They met at a coffee shop and talked about a lot of things, like the weather, movies and what they would do later that day, when Hanna decided to bring up, what everybody was thinking about. Spencer weird behaviour the day before.

"So, Spencer, you seemed to be pretty facinated by the new guy yesterday" she started. "WHAT?!" Spencer asked. "You were practically staring at him the whole time! Come on, whats up with you?" Hanna justifyed herself. "That is right." Emily and Aria added in unison.  
"Okay I was just looking at him a few times, because I always look at people sitting next to me I don't know.." Spencer tried to talk herself out of everything.

"Spencer you weren't just looking at him. You were staring!" Emily said again. "And this is the lamest lie I have evr heard by the way." Hanna added. "It is not.", Spencer tried to cut it of.  
"So you admit it was a lie!" "No, I just.." "You just what? Could not take your eyes away from his handsome face and body?" Hanna said winking.  
Aria looked at her confused. "Just because I have a boyfriend does not mean I can't find other guys attractive too!"

"Just by the way: What did professor Smith want from you two?" Emily quickly changed the subject. "He asked me to show Toby around a little bit. Thats all!" Spencer added the last part with a sidelook to Hanna who raised one eyebrow.  
"Maybe we should ask him to sit with us at lunch today? I mean, you are the only person herer he knows..", Emily said.  
"I think that is a great idea" was Arias opinion and Hanna seemed to be very pleased with that idea. Spencer just said "I will ask him.. But maybe you should bring Caleb and Jason too then, so he won't be the only guy."

"Don't make poor Emily the fith wheel!" Hanna said and when they all looked at her confused she explained:"Aria and Jason, me and Caleb and Spencer and Toby?!" Emilys and Arias mouth formed 'oh's' when they understood and Spencer just rolled her eyes and chose to ignore Hanna that one time.  
Spencer really loved her, but sometimes she wanted to throw something at her or hit her so hard she would never say anything again.

After talking a little bit more and leaving the Toby topic behind, they walked into class just a few seconds before their professor. They walked up to their seats and Toby, who already was in his place greeted Spencer with a little smile, wich caused Hanna to grin like an idiot.  
After the professor started talking, Aria seemed to remember about their plans for lunch and wrote a text to Jason, if he wanted to eat lunch with them.

Jason had been Arias boyfriend since they started in college, but both Spencer and Aria had known him since they werde little kids. And actually he was like the bigger brother she had never had and he was always there for her. She was really happy when he told Aria he would come, because she had not seen him in a while.

But that also ment she would have to ask Toby to come with them. I mean, it was not that she did not like him or something, but she still was confused because of him and she would rather just eat with him alone and not have Hanna there watching if there was something she could annoy Spencer with.  
When Hanna told them that Caleb, her boyfriend since High School, could come too they were looking at her, waiting for answer.

Spencer turned to Toby and when he realized that, he looked at her, too. Only after a few seconds looking at Toby, Spencer got lost in Tobys beautiful eyes. They were blue like the ocean, but not like the other day bright and shiny, because this time he wore a grey shirt. This made his eyes look like the ocean with a big storm over it and big waves and a lot of power in it.  
When Spencer realized she had been staring again, she remember that she had actually wanted to ask him something. She looked away from his eyes and could practically see her cheeks turn a little bit redder.

When she looked back up, she opened her mouth and was scared that no sound would come out of her mouth, but she actually managed to say the question she wanted to ask him. "We wondered, if you would like to have lunch with us today? Arias and Hannas boyfriends will be there, too, so you won't be the only guy." she added with a smile that instantly came, when she same him grinning a little bit about her being so nervous.

And yet again she started wondering, why he made her nervous and why she got these stupid teenage girl reactions around him and why she already liked him so much. Still he was just the new guy she was told to show around, but still she let him see so much of her like only her closest friends and family did. She cried in front of him about something he did not know about and he just held her and did not ask any questions and was just so nice to her.  
But maybe it just felt like that, because every other guy did not treat her like that. At least not for a long time.

When she saw him opening his mouth to answer, she noticed how fast her thoughts had been and then started to realize, taht she should listen to what he was about to say to answer her question.

"Yes, I would be happy to do that!" he said and her smile grew even wider, wich caused him to grin back.

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**Now is the time to answer to your reviews again! **

**_ .PLL_: Thank you very very much. I promised you it would all come together sonn and when you really know everything about her past, then you will hopefully understand Spencer a little bit more. And this past his more thatn you would think now.  
And I am really glad you liked Toby :)**

**_NewEnglandMuggleGirl_: Thank you. I just thought about how I could make them meet and get to know each other and like that, Spnecer really is the first person he knows at college, so they can become friends. Or maybe more, who knows that(Okay I do ;)).  
I am glad to hear that. I am trying to give you some information in each chapter, but not too much, so it is still interesting.**

_**dreamcat3er:**_** Of course I was really thankful for that. Without this kind of reviews, I would not know how I could make my story better and I am glad you liked the last one better. I hope you like this one, too. **

**Okay now back to all of you: I really hope you liked this chapter and I would love some more reviews. Without your reviews I don't know what I should do different and what is already good. So PLEASE REVIEW!**

**When I get 5 or more new reviews I will update and I will try to have the chapter ready as soon as possible. **

**I love you guys **

**xoxo PrettyLittleDoctorWho**


	5. Chapter 4

**I am back with an new chapter! :D I hope you all enjoy it and find time to review.  
****Sadly I still don't own Pretty Little Liars..**

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Spencer and Toby smiled at each other a while more until a lound noise from the front got both of them to turn their heads. To tell the truth, Spencer was really scared, that something bad had happend, but there was no problem. The professor just walked against his chair and it fell down.

Then Spencer remembered, that she should probably tell the others that Toby had said yes. She turned araound to Aria wich made her stop laughing about the professor and turn her head to Spencer. "He said he will come." "That's great!" Then Aria told the others, what caused Hanna to smirk once again. Their class went on for one more hour after that and Spencer, yet again, couldn't stop looking at Toby again and again and he actually did, too.

After class they went to the other side of the college, where Jason lived. He actually already had break and waited there for them, because he had just showered. When they came there, he wrapped Aria in his arms and pecked her on the lips. Then he turned to give Spencer his big bear hug and greeted the others.  
"Jason, this is Toby. He is new in our class. Toby this is Jason. He is Arias boyfriend and we have known him for a long time.", Spencer said.  
"Nice to meet you.", Jason said shaking Tobys hand. "You too.", he answered.

After a little bit of small talk, Hanna wanted to go get Caleb, who had his class near the cafeteria. This was probably being caused by Jason and Aria being really cute. When Hanna was around cute couples she always needed to see Caleb, what Spencer actually could understand really good, because she used to think like this, when she and Andrew were still together. And after their breakup it was really hard to be around them, because they were so happy. But Emily helped her to get through it. They kind of were alone together.

So they started walking and Spencer and Toby started talking. First it was just about class and all that stuff, but then they got to the point of friends and family.  
"You and Jason seem to be really close."  
"Yeah. He is like a brother to me!"  
"So you don't have a real brother?"  
"No, I don't..". Spencer got nervous about where this conversation was going, but galdly Toby noticed her nervousness and quickly changed the subject.

_Flashback_

_The next time Spencer opened her eyes, she felt a little bit dizzy adn when she opened her eyes, she saw that her leg and her arm were covered in bandages. She had just woken up, when a doctor came in. He seemed to be very young. He probably had just finished medical school or was still an intern. He had short brown hair, brown eyes and a really friendly smile.  
When he started talking, she also noticed his english accent. "Hello Spnecer. I am your doctor Wren Kingston. I am so glad you finally woke up."  
"How long have I slept?", Spencer asked, when she realized, that Dr. Kingston wasn't just talking about a few hours.  
"You came in sleeping and we had to operate you fast, so we couldn't wait until you woke up.. So about one and a half days."  
_

_The first thing that came back into Spencers mind at that moment, was the picture of the cars. And the she thought about her family. And then she realized, he had just said she had an operation. But obviously her family was way more important at that point.  
"What about my family?"_

When they walked up to Calebs classroom, he was already waiting for them outside and Hanna started running towards him as soon as she saw him. He jumped at him and he held her tight. Actually they saw each other a lot, but they were so in love they always behaved like they hadn't seen each othe rin month. Spencer did not have a problem with that. She was really happy for her friend, even though she annoyed her some times, with her talking about how much she missed him, when they had not seen each other for one day.

Once again they introduced Caleb and Toby to each other and they really seemed to like each other. Then they walked into the cafeteria, wich was actually really crowded. They went to get some food and that day it was pizza day, what made them all really happy, because the other food wasn't that good.  
Hanna and Aria got a pepperoni pizza together, Emily and Spencer shared one with ham and pineapple. Toby, Caleb and Toby all got one with a lot of stuff on it.  
Spencer actually believed, it really was everything htey had in the kitchen. There was ham, salami, mushrooms, pepperoni, peppers, pinapples and, I am not kidding, noodles.

They went to find some seats, wich was really hard, because they needed a whole table for all of them to fit. They actually found one in the little corner at the other end of the room and sat down. But just then they realized, they forgot to get some water.  
"I can go and get some!", Spencer said and Hanna wanted to go and help her.

When they were a little bit away from their table, Hanna said, what Spencer had hoped she would not say. "You two are really cute! How you talked and could not stop talking..", she started, but Spencer cut her off. " There is nothing going on! I was just telling him things about this college, because I was asked to."  
"So you say, you don't like him?" " No, of course not! He is nice, but first: we have known each other for less than a day and second: even if I liked him that way, there would be no chance!"

"Oh my god! You do like him that way!", Hanna exclaimed. She always was one of the girls who thought, that girls always say the opposite of what they really mean. Spencer always thought, taht this was completely wrong. She had been realyy rational all of her life and always said exactly what she meant. But now she started to slowly believe, what Hanna was saying.  
Spencer totally knew, she was thinking about all of that, but she was not sure about it and that was why she didn't agree with Hanna.

She grabbed a few water bottles whiel she said her last words and then turned around and started walking back. Hanna quickly grabbed a few more bottles and started runnign after Spencer. "Wait, Spencer! I am sorry! I know, you don't like thinking about stuff like that after Andrew. I shouldn't have brought that up." Spencer could see the honesty in Hannas face so she just said: " It's okay. I know you like doing that!" with a wink and made Hanna smile with that.

When they got back to the table, they saw Caleb and Toby talking about something and then starting to laugh. "Seems like they found a new friend", Hanna said smiling at Spencer. "Yes, seems so!" Spencer said happy. She was happy for serveral reasons. Reason number one was obviously, that he found a friend here besides her, but reason number two, was something she would never admit to hersef.  
Reason number two was, taht when he was friends with her friends, that would mean, they would see each other more often. And Hanna wouldn't have a reason, to annoy her again. When they finished eating, they went to their next class. Caleb and Jason had to get to their classes then too, so they said goodbye and walked away.

Later that they Toby were together again, because he was walking her to her house, because Aria was at Jasons and the others did not have any time either and Toby said, she helped to not be alone the whole day, so he could be with her, too. But what Spencer did not know, was that he wanted to be alone with her, because he wanted to ask her something.

When they got to the apartment, Spencer got her key out and opened the door. "Do you want some coffee?", Spencer asked. She always made herself coffee. She drank it at any time and whereever she was. "Yes, thank you.", Toby replided and walked into the little living room behind Spencer. While she went over to the kitchen to make the coffee she told him to sit down if he wanted to and gestured towards their sofa.

When Spencer had the coffee ready, she went to the couch and joined Toby.  
"Spencer, can I ask you something?" This little question made her get really emotional. She was scared, curious and happy about him actually askinf for a permission, but being scared was the most active emotion at that point.

This little questin made her always so scared about what the qusetion would be. It could be positive, but it could also be something negative or something she would not know what to answer. The last possibility was actually the one she feared the most. She did not want to let him hear how nervous she got, so she just nodded.

"When we talked earlier, you seemed to get really tense, when we started talking about family. Do you want to tell me why that is?"

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**So, first of all: Thank you for reading! And I want to thank .PLL for writing a review for me!**

**I really appreciate, that you read and follow this story, but I really NEED the reviews. If I don't get them, I don't know, if you like this story, what you think is good about and what I should/could do better. So PLEASE review!**

**_ .PLL._: Haha, thank you very very much. I love you for this review and all the other reviews you have written. Please keep that going and maybe tell some friends? :D But again: THANK YOU 33**

**I will say it again now: I hope you liked this and I will try to not break your heart too much in this story, if you review ;)  
Kidding, but really: please update! I know I said it a lot now, but it did not work before..**

**But still: I love you guys!**

**xoxo PrettyLittleDoctorWho**


	6. Chapter 5

**Hey Guys! I am back!  
****I know I apologize for my late updates nearly every chapter, but I have to do it again.  
****This time there w****ere a lot of reasons for that. First of all I had a huge writers block for nearly one and a half week, wich is really a lot for me. Then again, I have a lot of stuff to do for school and I have long school and a lot of hobbies and, believe it or not, I have to do stuff like eating. SO again: I am really sorry!**

**I hope this chapter will make you guys forgive me for that..  
I don't know how often I have to say this, but sadly I still don't own Pretty Little Liars.**

**Have fun with this chapter! 3**

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"Do you want to tell me why that is?" Spencer tensed up the second he said these words and as soon as Toby realized that, he started talking again. "Okay, it was probably a bad idea to ask that.. I know, you don't really know me and I don't really know you and you won't tell me. But you are just my best friend here and I realized it and I am worrided about you.. I am sorry I asked.." he blurted out so fast Spencer needed a few seconds to take in all of the words he just said.

Spencer opened her mouth and closed it again. She really wanted to talk about it all, but he was right. She didn't know him. Not at all. But still she trusted him enough to tell him everything she kept from everybody but her best friends, wich meant everybody but Aria, Hanna, Emily and Jason. And it took her a whole year to tell Emily and Hanna. And for Jason and Aria: She did not really tell them. They already knew her really good, when it all happened and so they automatically knew everything. But she would've probably told them anyway. They were like family to her.

He looked at her the whole time she thought and tried to read any of her thoughts from her face, but it did not change at all. She just seemed to relax a little bit, so that must be good, right? Then she opened her mouth again and actually said something.

"You are right, we don't really know each other, but you don't have to be sorry for being concerned about me. That is a really nice thing to do and most people would have just ignored my changing mood. But still I can't tell you. Not yet, but I promise I will some day."  
Most people woud not have been lucky about this answer, because most most people would want an answer when they actually asked about something like that. But Toby was not like everybody else. He was special and Spencer knew that, when he answered her again.

"That is all I can ask for." After that was said there was a really awkward silence in the room and when it felr like a minute or something Spencer asked, if Toby wanted to watch a movie and order some pizza or thai food or something like that and he said yes.

Before Spencer left the room to order the pizza, she gave Toby her DVD collection and told him to pick a movie. He picked a funny movie, because he wanted to cheer Spencer up and so they started watching the princess bride. When they were halfway through the movie their pizza arrieved and they finished the movie, before they could eat more than two slices of their pizza, because they laughed so much it was hard to eat.

While they finished eating they still laughed a lot. Actually it was more like this: Toby telling a stupid joke, Spencer laughing about it, Toby laughing with her, because Spencer laughing just maked you smile.  
Eventually they managed to finish and then started cleaning up. While they did that, Aria came back and saw them laughing like idiots and making fun of each other. Aria was grinning from ear to ear and just stood in the doorway from the living room until Toby saw her standing there.

He looked at her confused, then his face was red like a tomatoe and said "Hi Aria..", wich caused Spencer to look up at her best friend and turn red too.  
"Hi Toby. Spencer" Aria said with a wide grin on her face while she started walking towards Arias and Spencers bedroom. Some people may think it is strange, when two girls share a bedroom. Especially if they have boyfriends(they both had one when they started college.). But it wasn't they had one rule: No boyfriends in the bedroom.  
And it actually made a lot of sence for them to share their bedroom. When they started college, including living together, Spencer has had her nightmare very often and this way Aria could always be there for her friend.

When Aria had left the living room there was an awkward silence. Again, After a while Toby got a text and looked at his phone. "That was my friend from back home.. I should probably go, it is already 10.30 and he wants to talk to me.."  
"Yeah, you are probably right.." Spencer trailed of a little. She would not admit it, but she was really sad, that Toby already had to go. She really liked being around him and hadn't felt that comfortable around any boy since the breakup.

Spencer walked Toby to the door and it got awkward again, because they didn't know how to say goodbye. They both felt like giving the other person a hug, but they both thought, the other person would find that awkward. But something in the back of Spencers mind told her to just do it, so she did and it was not unwelcomed by Toby again. When they pulled back they both smiled and Spencer whispered "Bye". Toby walked down the stairs and waved her goodbye again while walking backwards.

When he had turned around, Spencer still stood there looking after him. She jumped up, when Aria stood next to her and said: "Hanna was right." gave Spencer a wink and went back inside.

That evenig Spencer found herself thinking about that a lot. She thought about what she told herself after the breakup and about how good it felt to be around Toby. He was so understanding and nice and the opposite of what men were like in her mind. Spencer could not remember how long she just laid in bed and thought about that, but she eventually drifted to a sleep with a dream. But this time it wasn't the nightmare. It was a nice dream, but the next morning, she couldn't remember what it was about. She just knew it was nice.

The next weeks, were really normal and nothing special happened. Toby and Spencer got closer, but they did not meet alone again, because Hanna, of course, had teased them about everything. Aria had told her about the evening. Other than that nothing important happened.

When Spencer woke up she smelled breakfeast and was happily getting up and walked into the kitchen, where she expected Aria to make the breakfeast. That wasn't wrong, but Aria was not alone. Hanna and Emily were with her.

"Good morning sunshine" Hanna joked. "Morning Han." Spencer replied without thinking about her starnge way to great and the grin on her face. "Morning Em." "Hey" Emily greeted back.  
"Breakfeast is ready!" Aria announced and put four plates on the table and the pancakes she had just made for them. And you should know one thing about Arias pancakes. They are the best pancakes ever made in this universe. You can imagine them like this: Think of the best panckes you have ever had. And now think of something 10 times better. Like that you may come close to the way Arias pancakes tasted. Adding to this Aria had made eggs and bacon.

"Ready for the last day before Thanksgiving break?" Aria asked after a while of eating in silence. "Of course! Time for shopping!" was Hannas answer. Everybody had to laugh about that. But for Spencer there was a shadow hanging over her Thanksgiving, that had been there for some time now.

They talked about their plans for Thanksgiving some more, even though Spencer did not say much about hers. Then they left for their class.

When they entered the classroom, Toby waved them over and grinned. "Hey Ladies" was his typical greeting for them. "Why are you so happy today, Tobes?" Emily asked. Over thelast few weeks they all became good friends with him, but Emily and Spencer the most.  
"I have a surprise for all of you." was everything he said and then their professor walked in and stopped their converstaion with a loud "Good morning. I know you all don't want to be here today, I don't want it either, but it is my job, so let's get this over fast."

While the professor talked and talked and talked neither of the girls could really listen to what he said. For Hanna that was normal, but the other normally listened to him. But when someone tells you they have a surprise for you and don't tell you what it is, it is hard to concentrate on something else.  
Toby had a lot of fun in this lesson, because he realized that they were all very unconcentrated and often looking at him and whispering and sending him text, what the surprise was all about, but he only answered 'Wait and see!' wich made them even more excited and nervous.  
If you have ever done anything like that, you know how much fun he had. If not, try it sometime!

When the lesson was finally over, Toby practically ran outside and the girls ran after him. "Toby! Stop running away, please?" Hanna practically begged him and he actually stopped.  
"Okay, okay, you got me!" he was laughing so hard, it was hard to understand anything he was saying.  
"Now come on! What is your surprise?! Aria asked, because even she started to be impatient, wich showed Toby it was time.

"Becuase it is Thanksgiving soon and I won't spend it here, I braught you all presents." He said that while pulling out four little presents out of his bag.  
"Oh my god! That is so sweet of you!"  
"You shouldn't have done that.." ans  
"But I didn't get you anything!" were just a few of the answers they blurted out so fast and all at the same time. Toby was so happy, they reacted happily and gave them their presents and a hug for each of the girls.

He got Hanna a present card for one of her favourite shops, Aria a new pair of feather earrings, Emily a waterproof clock and Spencer a book. But it wasn't just any book. It was THE book for Spencer. She had wanted to have it for a long time, but she was never able to find it anywere.

"Oh my God, Toby! Thank you so much! Where did you find that?!" Spencer said in disbelieve while staring at the book, wich Toby found really adorable.  
"Group Hug!" was what Hanna had to said and she pulled all of them into a BIG and long hug.  
All of the girls thanked him a thousand times more, while they ate lunch.

"Hey, Toby?"  
"Yeah, Em?"  
"You said you would not spend Thanksgiving here. What are you doing then?"  
"I will visit my friends back home.."  
"What about your family?" Hanna asked, wich pprobably was not a good idea, because that reminded Spencer of the promise she gave Toby and Toby seemed to remember too, because he looked at her, while answering  
"I don't really like being with them.. My family is really screwed up.."

Spencer gave him a little smile to tell him it was okay, to talk about family and stuff, but she was still uncomfortable about it and he realized that. They talked a little bit more and then Hanna and Aria went to see Jason and Caleb and Emily, Spencer and Toby went to their houses on campus.

Spencer started packing her stuff for Thanksgiving, when her doorbell rang. Spencer was confused, because Aria wanted to come over in just a few hours and she had a key. She started making her way to the door, while putting her messy hair into a high bun.

When she opened the door, she was surprised to see Toby standing there.

"Hey! I just wanted to say goodbye before I leave.." he trailed of, when he was really looking at Spencer and her surroundings. It looked like she wanted to leave too, but she hadn't said anything about that, so he was confused.

"Are you leaving too?" Spencer did not plan on telling him, because she knew, that she would have to tell him then, but now she kind of had too. And she really wanted to tell him by now, but she didn't know how to.

When Toby saw the look on Spencers face, he regretted he asked. Her face was so sad, it made him sad too. Spencer realized the concern on Tobys face, wich reassured Spencer, it was the right time to tell him.

"Yes I am leaving for Thanksgiving. I will visit my family."

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**So, what did you think? I really hope you liked it.**

**_ .PLL: _Once again: Thank you for your review! I can't tell you how thankfull I am for that. You are still the ONLY person that reviewed. And by the way, I checked your one shot collection out. It is really good.  
You can't believe how happy I was when I read your review! So thank you!**

**Now a few things for everyone to read ;)  
**

**First: In case you wondered, why there was no flashback in this chapter, I did not forget it, I did it on purpose. I wanted to make this a more happy chapter then the last ones and do some Spoby-friendship-fluff stuff in it :D  
I hope I kind of got that. **

**Then second: This is offically my longest chapter ever! It has without my Authors note 2,142 words long, wich is longer then the others were with my note. **

**Third: I will really try to update more often now, but it is really hard and maybe you could help me with my motivation? Wich leads me to**

**Fourth: Pleasse review! I know I said that really often now, but I mean it! It will give me ideas or at least a little bit more motivation. Even if you tell me you don't like it, it would help, as long as you tell me why not. Then I would get an idea, what I could do better, but when you don't review, I don't know anything. I don't know if it is good, if it is bad or something in between.  
So PLEASE help me!**

**Because I know you read, even if you don't review(yes, I can see that for all of you that don't have an account;)) so I still love you for that.**

**Keep watching PLL and ship everything you like! I do that too ;)**

**xoxo PrettyLittleDoctorWho**


	7. Chapter 6

**Guys, I am back! I am so sorry(again, I know...) for not updating sooner, but this time I have a real excuse. I was gone for a few days, because we had this vacation thing from school and we did not have internet acces for laptops there, plus we were not allowed to bring any laptops or stuff like that...**

**I will stop chatting now, I hope you like this chapter!**

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After Spencer told him she was visiting her family, she asked him to come inside.  
"If you still want to know, I can tell you about my family now." Toby was actually really happy, that she trusted him enough to talk to him now, but he was also scared. Scared of what she would tell him and scared, if she was really wanting to tell him. He was scared, that she was telling him, because she felt like she had to. He didn't want her to feel like he pressured her to tell.-

"You don't have to, if you still don't want to."  
"I want to. I trust you enough now and I know you won't tell anyone I don't want to know."

They both went inside and sat down on the couch and she was looking him right into the eyes, when she started to talk.

"When I was seven, me and my family were going to visit one of my friends and her family at Thanksgiving. I hadn't seen her for a long time, because she lives in Portland and we lived in Rosewood. My family is still there. I just left because of college.  
So, we were on our way to her house on the highway and everything was fine. But then we got into a car accident. The other car crashed into the side my father and me sat.  
When I was in the hospital, the doctors told me, I had several broken bones and a lot of other things I don't all remember. And even though I was still so young, I knew the doctor was not allowed to tell me anything about my family, because they were also patients. But I still asked, because I hoped they were not actually patients and that they were fine. But they weren't."

At this point Spencer already was crying and sobbing once again, but she wanted to go on. Toby was so scared at this point, he wasn't sure if he wanted Spencer to go on with her story, but she did and he started crying too, when she told him:  
" The doctor said he could go and get my mum, because she was fine enough. While he was gone I started to really think about everything and I was so scared about my dad then, because the doctor was getting my mum and my dad was sitting on the side the car was crashing in. I did not realize it, but I started crying just at the thought of losing him. And I was still crying, when my mom came in and she rushed over to me and started crying with me. Later I asked her why and she told me, it was because I had slept for a whole day and she already knew about my dad.

"After we cried for what felt like days, I asked her about Melissa, my sister, and dad. Melissa was actually fine. Not really fine, but under the circumstances she really was. But my dad wasn't.  
He was injured the most and he still hadn't woken up. And he still hasn't. He has been in a coma for twelve years now."

After Spencer finished the story, she looked up in Toby's eyes. She had not realized that she had stopped looking at him, but she had.  
And what she saw now broke her heart. Toby's smile, that was so wonderful and warm was gone and there were tears streaming down his face. His normally ocean blue eyes were dark like the sky in a storm. And they were filled with sadness.

They just looked at each other crying for a moment and then Toby took a deep breath, before saying  
"I am **so** sorry, Spencer" and then he took Spencer in his arms again.  
They stayed like this for what felt like hours and Spencer felt like lying there I Toby's arms just crying forever. It made her feel better. It made her feel safe. And she eventually stopped crying. But she still didn't want to move. But she had to and she knew that.

Even though she knew it, she still stayed like that thinking. Then one thought stayed in her head. Why had Toby cried so much? Why did he look so sad? She knew it was more than just her story. There was something he hadn't told her either. And she realized that now.

She knew, that he had been patient with her and waited until she was ready to tell her story. She also knew she owed him to be like that too, but she just could not help but ask. He had looked so hurt and she wanted to make him feel better, like he did for her. So she took her head back to look at him again.

"Toby?"  
"Yes?"  
"Why are you so sad now? I know it can't be just because of my story. What is wrong?"  
Toby took a deep breath, before he decided how to answer her question.

"I guess I have not been completely honest about my family either." Now there was no turning back for Toby. He had to tell her why he really didn't want to meet his family on Thanksgiving.  
He wanted to have fun on Thanksgiving and he knew with his family it would be sad. At least for him.

And that was why he thought Spencer was the strongest person he had ever met. She would probably be spending her Thanksgiving crying with her family, even though it should be full of laughter and fun. But maybe the reason she was strong enough to do all of this, was because she would be crying with her family. Toby was scared he would be the only one sad in his family.

"Toby? What is wrong?" Spencer asked again and Toby was surprised to hear so much concern and love in her voice.

"It is just… my family is not just totally screwed up.. It is more like a compete mess and…" his voice was cracking again, when he said these words. "And I just realized, that you are so strong!"

"Toby? You scare me! Please just tell me what is wrong so I can help you the way you helped me! It makes you feel better! I promise!"

He knew that it would help to tell Spencer everything. But he also knew that was because of Spencer and not because of the talking.

"My family is not completely my **real** family.. I have my father and a stepmother with her daughter.  
My mum… She.. She died…When I was ten years old and…..I just never really got over it….." His voice cracked, because he started crying again.

"Oh god, Toby! I am **so** sorry!"  
This time it was her who held him and told him everything would be okay. Even though the both knew, that it would not be okay. Not ever. Toby's mom was dead and that would never change.  
But eventually the sound of Spencer talking so soft and low with him adding to the fact that she held him so close made him feel better.

It somehow reminded him of the way his mom used to hold him when he was sad or hurt in any way.

The two of them sat there crying again for a long time until they ran out of water to cry. From that point on, they just sat there wishing to stay like this forever. But they could not. The world still kept turning, the sun kept shining and the birds kept singing.

Life had to go on.

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**I really hope you liked this chapter! It was not easy to write and I had to listen to sad music while writing.. I am normally a really bubbly and always smiling girl, so it is really hard to write chapters like this one. But I hope it was okay.**

**_ .PLL.: _****Here it is, but you willhave to wait for Thanksgiving a liitle bit more.. I am sorry for that, but it will come!**

_**Mrs. KeeganAllen: **_**Thank you very much! I hope you liked this one too! And btw I like your name ;)**

**Okay, I hope I got the atmosphere in this chapter okay, because personally I think this chapter sucked.. And I am sorry for that, but writing a sad chapter like this one(at least it was supposed to be sad) is really hard for me..**

**I will try to update sooner next time!**

**Please read&review!**

**I love you guys!**

**xoxo PrettyLittleDoctorWho**


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